Samism Number 21

Sam: "So Mum, when we collect all of these Discovery Channel DVD's we win the lotto?

Me: "No"

Samism Number 20

Sam: "So Mum. A typhoon is a Japanese Hurricane, correct?"

Samism Number 19

Sam: "Mum, do you know what I wish was real?"

Me: "No What?"

Sam: "Apple Ipod City, so I could listen to Have a Little Faith in Us on my Ipod all day long"

Samism Number 18

Sam: "What are all those spots on the ceiling?"

He is pointing at the ceiling of my car.

Me: "Probably some sort of coffee mishap"

Half a minute later Sam starts to sing to the Spiderman theme "Spiderpig, spiderpig, does whatever a spiderpig does"

Samism Number 17

Sam: "Mum, want to play an emotional game with me?"

Me: "Yeah I suppose, how do we play it?"

Sam: "We need a grater and an onion. Then we grate them near each other eyes and see who cries first"

Samism Number 16

Today we went down to the beach where Sam came across a new Seabush

Sam: "Oh my god Mum, since I last saw him, Seabushy has become a tween"

Me: "How can you tell?"

Sam: "His attitude"

Seabushy is now in a container, in water, over our kitchen sink".

See below for explanation of a seabush.

Samism Number 15

Sam: "Is mamasaymamasarmmmumfordson a rude word?"

Me: "No"

Sam: "Good"

Then walks off singing - Please don't stop the music, music, music, music mamasaymamasarmmmumfordson mamasaymamasarmmmumfordson"

Samism Number 14

Jack had his cast removed and the doctor was checking his wrists for any pain.

Sam: "For crying out loud doc, don't give him a chinese burn, he's just had broken arms"

Samism Number 13

Sam shouting (out of breath from running inside with ipod still in ears)

"Mum, is homicide a rude word?"

Me: "No but.."

Sam: "Good" and runs off.

Think maybe I need to nanny cam his room.

Samism Number 12

Jack had managed to get his cast off his broken arm and Phil was trying to get it back on his hand. He said to Jack "If the doctor sees your hand out of your cast he'll be very angry".

Sam: "How Angry?"

Phil: "I don't know, pretty angry"

Sam: "Angry enough to burn our house down?"

Samism Number 11

Sam: "Mum, when I turn into a teenager, I'm changing my name"

Me: "Oh? What to?"

Sam: "Sam Whit Whicki Morley"

Fair Call.

Samism Number 10

Sam to His dad: "You're hideous"

Dad: "Thanks"

Sam: "It's not a compliment"

Samism Number 9

"Mum, do you know why I love Milo so much?"

Me: "No"

"Because of the Omega 3 Content"

Samism Number 8

10 Year old Sister to Sam: "What do I look like with this scarf around my head?"

Sam: "A dog"

Samism Number 7

Sitting in front of the orthopedic doctor yesterday pipes up with (in tune to TikToc)

"Boys trying to touch my junk, junk, gunna smack em if they get too drunk drunk"

Complete with booty shaking.

Samism Number 6

We are standing many stories up in a hospital waiting room. Sam looks out the window and says

"Look at all those gentle giants"

Samism Number 5

"So PC means before Jesus died?"

Samism Number 4

"Mum, one little known fact."

(Produces Seabushy for all to see)

"Sea bushes do not have testicles"

Samism Number 3

"Know what I'm going to name my sea bush?"(seaweed from the ocean).

"Seabushy"

Samism Number 2

"I can't wait for you to go back to work so I can ask you how your day was"

Samism Number 1

"Stud is a short word for Dad"